Missing Your Ex Isn’t Love — It’s Brain Withdrawal

(and this song hits too hard…)

Sometimes, the hardest person to forget isn’t the one who treated you right — it’s the one who broke you.Weird? Not really. Your brain plays cruel games: dopamine withdrawal and trauma bonding.

You think it’s love. But maybe it’s just addiction.

When a Breakup Feels Like Detox

Falling in love is basically a chemical trip. Your brain floods with dopamine and oxytocin — the same stuff that fires when you’re on a natural high.Every text, every laugh, every 2 A.M. call — pure euphoria.

But when they’re gone, the supply drops.Suddenly you’re shaking, restless, checking your phone, replaying memories.

You’re not being dramatic — you’re literally in dopamine withdrawal.Neuroscientists at Big Think explain that heartbreak lights up the same brain zones triggered by substance withdrawal.Even GQ puts it bluntly:

“Falling in love feels like a drug high. Breaking up feels like quitting cold turkey.”

---

Trauma Bonding — When Pain Becomes Home

Ever notice how you miss even the person who hurt you?That’s trauma bonding — when your brain ties love to pain.The more they hurt you, the tighter your mind clings to the few good moments they gave.

It’s a survival loop: pain → reward → pain → reward.

Your brain learns to chase the “high” that occasionally appears between chaos.

Clinical studies confirm that early-stage romance mimics addiction in the brain — craving, dependency, and withdrawal symptoms are all there (NIH PMC Study).

Songs like Billie Eilish – “Happier Than Ever” or Adele – “Someone Like You” capture that ache perfectly — when the pain starts sounding like nostalgia.

---

Realization Hits: You’re Missing the Feeling, Not the Person

At some point, it clicks — you don’t miss them, you miss how you felt with them.The butterflies, the dopamine rush, the illusion of being seen.

“So freaking bad news that I’ll never be yours.” – Naomi Ivo

That line hurts — but it also heals.Because freedom starts when you stop chasing your dealer.

You can get your dopamine elsewhere: in creativity, friends, sunlight, even quiet.

As Psychology Today puts it, cutting reminders (texts, playlists, photos) helps the brain rewire

faster after heartbreak.

---

🎧 Healing Playlist (If You Know, You Know)

Each song here hits a different nerve — from withdrawal, to clarity, to peace:

• Naomi Ivo – “Never Be Yours” → that bittersweet acceptance.

• Olivia Rodrigo – “Traitor” → rage with melody.

• Sam Smith – “Too Good at Goodbyes” → detachment disguised as grace.

• The Weeknd – “Call Out My Name” → the haunting addiction vibe.

• Billie Eilish – “What Was I Made For?” → soft crash after chaos.

• Adele – “Love in the Dark” → when you finally let go.

• Dewanda Pratama – “Pantas Bahagia” → Indonesian soul in heartbreak form — pure raw emotion that bridges the pain.

You’re Not Alone — Just Human

Your brain isn’t broken. It’s healing.And that “so freaking bad news” might just be the start of your comeback story.

One day you’ll laugh and think,

“Did I really waste my best years on someone like that?”

And maybe that’s the real win —Not forgetting them,but remembering you.

🎵 Primary Song Reference: Naomi Ivo – Never Be Yours

📚 Supporting References: Big Think, GQ, Psychology Today, NIH PMC

#HeartbreakNeuroscience #NaomiIvo #DewandaPratama #DopamineDetox #LoveAddiction #TraumaBonding #LettingGo